Monday, January 11, 2010

to the nonjiggle goal

I woke up with the motivation of a pregnant slug this morning. YIKES. Then I read my friend Robin's posts and it snapped me back, so thanks shug!

I have officially (meaning logged on the WW Website) reached my first 10%...I CAN do this for another year and a half. Because...I had my doubts, but it is true that you change your lifestyle following weight watchers. I literally don't 'go there' when I'm in a funk. I'm digging that!!!!

It was an amazing experience to be able to crawl, play, roll around and 'mess with' my son on the floor yesterday and not get winded or tired. And, I cannot believe I'm putting this in print on a website, but here goes...I can bend over at the waist, touch the floor and not have to spread my legs OR bend my knees to accommodate my gut. :) That is HUGE to me! For those of you who don't know, my goal long term is (aside from being attractive and healthy, yadayadayada) that #1 - when I jump up and down, the only thing I can feel jiggle upon landing is my boobs (this will become even more important in the marathon Summer 2011)...and #2) - when I step on an elevator or cross the floor at my parents, I don't feel the elevator drop OR the glass wiggle in my parents china cabinet...

While that may sound stupid, retarded or just plain strange, those are experiences that are discrete reminders of my horizontal challenge and I want to rid my experience on this earth of any of those. To a new week of work, fun, fitness and caloric deprivation for the greater good.

Friday, January 8, 2010

whole different perspective

I'm amazed by the fact that what used to be a crippling crutch has become what I'm holding on to. I have, for the better part of 35 years, been fat my entire life. I have, all of that time, never wanted to change it for good, but rather, just change it. I have, every time, lost and gained it all back...and I have, (deep breath), always avoided acknowledging all of this...

So, imagine my surprise as I struggle with a bit of an identity crisis with the last year's events (I'll briefly recap):
  • moving back to RTP
  • new job that is a challenge for reasons I can't control but that the function of which I absolutely LOVE
  • varner's dumb ass move of offing herself
  • selling the harley
  • giving birth to the most amazing kid on the planet
  • oh yeah...and being on the LONGEST dry spell of my life with no end in sight b/c I never leave the damn HOUSE.
I digress, imagine my surprise this morning to wake up and realize that I'm not afraid of my weight anymore...in fact, if it had its own cognition it should fear the #$%k out of me, because I am OFFICIALLY kicking my own ass! 10% down as of today...I could cry I'm so thrilled. I never, ever in a bajillion years would have expected THIS change to be the one that sustaining me through the struggles...I never, ever would have expected to say and mean it (my bff Jeanette was the recipient of this gem), "I'm so PISSED I can't workout this week!"...holy $hit, kids! Straight up, where the hell did the lazy-ass, energy-strapped, fat girl go???

Maybe it's fueled by frustrations and anxiety, maybe it's the prescription my doctor has me on to help me 'speed myself' in my hormonally-screwed new body post baby...I don't know and (right now) don't care where it's coming from...because this $hit is KEWL. :)

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

I can do everything!!!!

Well team CMama get thinner...we did it. We navigated the holidays and lost 13.9 lbs b/w Thanksgiving and the New Year...first week in the New Year SUCKED...but it's getting better. As of this a.m. I'm down a total 22.9 lbs. I can respect THAT!

86.9 more to go...that is SO much better than over 87 or over 90 or over 100 or 108 for that matter....whooo hoo!!!!!